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International Day of Happiness is celebrated each year on 20 March as a new paradigm to achieve the United Nations global goals for the happiness, wellbeing and freedom of all life on earth. This article will explore the topic of happiness more generally, while next month I’ll look in more detail at the elements of my “prescription for happiness”.
Just think for a minute. How many people in your network do you know that are really thriving and living lives that are happy, purposeful and fulfilling? If it’s three in 10 or more, then the chances are you’re lucky enough to be in the company of a particularly positive group of people.
In today’s world where many people are exposed to negative stress and needless negativity
Research shows on average only about 20% of people are flourishing or living life at, or close to, their optimal potential, while the rest of us are plodding along in the middle somewhere or even worse, languishing at the bottom.
In today’s world where many people are exposed to negative stress and needless negativity, I believe cultivating purpose, and a sense of fulfilment to be key ingredients for real contentment and overall wellbeing. The starting point rather than the end point for creating a life of success and vitality.
Strong v wrong
This is backed up by a wealth of scientific research from the field of positive psychology, a relatively new field of psychology that looks at what’s going well rather than what’s not, what’s strong rather than what’s wrong.
Happiness is a word that I believe is often misunderstood. It is not about denying reality, sticking your head in the sand or pretending that things are other than as they are. It’s not about a far-flung destination of perfection.
Being able to make the most of good times and having the resilience to deal with tough times
Similarly, it’s not about denying negative emotions or repressing emotions of fear or anxiety. To experience negative emotion is part and parcel of life, of being human. I have a term I use called “emotional agility” – being able to recognise and accept all of your emotions, the positive and the negative. Being able to make the most of good times and having the resilience to deal with tough times.
I believe happiness, fulfilment and contentment are not optional extras but essential to your wellbeing
You see we are not hard-wired for happiness; we are hard-wired for survival. In a world full of danger and threat, the primitive brain is concerned with staying alive, with happiness an optional extra. But in today’s world, where there is so much distraction, and so much needless negativity, I believe happiness, fulfilment and contentment are not optional extras but essential to your wellbeing.
Of course the word “happiness” includes moment-to-moment experiences of happiness as well as reflected happiness (looking back on your life to date). Perhaps my best definition of happiness is having something to be grateful for, someone to love, something useful to do and something to look forward to.
Lasting happiness does not really come from material things
As humans, the evidence suggests we seem happiest when we have purpose and meaning, robust relationships, and a sense of engagement and accomplishment in our lives.
A major cause of unhappiness nowadays is the social envy generated by the proliferation of perfectionism on social media. But lasting happiness does not really come from material things.
As little as 10% of your potential happiness comes from the toys you own or the watch you wear. This is because of a psychological principle known as hedonic adaptation whereby you simply adapt and get used to your circumstances.
Regardless of whether the watch you wear costs €20 or €200, it tells the same time
On the plus side, this helps recovery from adversity and is a factor in resilience. On the down side, it means that more material comforts (once you have a roof over your head, three square meals a day etc) will not necessarily lead to any sustainable increase in your level of happiness. After a while you return to your happiness set point.
Regardless of whether the watch you wear costs €20 or €200, it tells the same time. No matter how many pairs of shoes you have, you can only wear one pair at a time. No matter what type of house you live in, the impact of loneliness can be the same.
Forty per cent solution
About 50% of your potential happiness is thought to be inherited and only 10% is down to your life circumstances (because of the hedonic adaptation effect).
While you can’t change your genetics (though the exciting new area of epigenetics is showing how your lifestyle can positively impact how your genes express themselves), and while it can be difficult and often impractical to change your life circumstances, there is still 40% of your potential happiness that is up for grabs. I call this the “40% solution”.
These are some simple and inexpensive habits which not only feel good in the moment but can have a big impact over time on your overall sense of wellbeing. Supporting you in becoming more successful by whatever way you want to define success – whether it’s by the quality of your relationships, career accomplishments, creativity, energy or your health.
Emotional positivity is contagious through your social networks
Choosing to enhance your self-care and cultivate inner contentment and happiness is a fundamental commitment to become aware of the potential for everyday happiness that lies inside you. Giving you more balance, harmony and fulfilment; a platform for success and a life of real vitality.
Furthermore, emotional positivity is contagious through your social networks, spreading in a ripple effect through your family, organisation, workplace and community. Enabling you to be better – not just to yourself but indeed everyone that matters. A real win-win-win.
Next month we will have a closer look at this 40% solution by examining some of the elements of my “prescription for happiness”. To your health (and happiness!).
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