Dear Miriam,

I have a problem in relation to COVID-19 and social distancing. Ever since the restrictions have come in, myself and my family have taken them very seriously. My father is very strict with us, due to the fact that my mother has underlying health conditions, and for that reason I have not seen my boyfriend since the pandemic started.

My problem is that he is not taking this pandemic seriously at all

To be honest, it does not bother me – now I miss him, don’t get me wrong – but there are people out there Miriam in worse scenarios than myself. My problem is that he is not taking this pandemic seriously at all.

We live about a half an hour away from each other and at the start of this, he was making me feel guilty about not going to see him. To me, his family don’t seem to be taking any notice of this pandemic at all.

This boils my blood

They are still socialising; social distancing does not exist and people are still calling around to their house for tea and chats. This boils my blood.

While most of the nation are making extreme sacrifices to get rid of COVID-19, there are a minority who think they are above what is happening and refuse to co-operate. Unfortunately, he and his family fall into this minority.

I have tried talking to him so many times and explaining to him how serious this is

Miriam, this really is testing our relationship, as I am seeing how different we both are acting when it comes to something like this. I have tried talking to him so many times and explaining to him how serious this is, but he does not seem to care.

He is a smoker and although he is young, if he got this virus I would be seriously worried about him. Have you any advice on how I should handle it or should I just leave him be and carry on minding myself and my family?

Galway Girl

Dear Galway Girl,

Thank you very much for your letter. Firstly, well done to you and your family for taking the necessary precautions to protect each other. It is not easy, but as you know, it is the right thing to do.

I think there are many people around the country struggling to get across the importance of social distancing to someone in their life. Be it an immediate family member, an aunt/uncle or like yourself, a boyfriend/girlfriend.

Even if he isn’t worried about himself, what if his parents get coronavirus?

I know you have tried speaking to your boyfriend about the importance of social distancing, but maybe give it one more shot. Try and impress upon him the danger he is putting everyone around him in.

Try and get across the duty of care he has to others

Even if he isn’t worried about himself, what if his parents get coronavirus? The people calling around to the house, he could pass the virus on to them. Try and get across the duty of care he has to others.

Also, explain to him that he is prolonging when you can next see each other. If he was taking the correct precautions, maybe when restrictions are eased it will be possible to meet up.

I have heard of several couples who are unable to see each other at present and are finding things difficult

But, if he is at risk of having the virus, tell him you won’t meet him. You have to look after your mother and it is as simple as that.

I have heard of several couples who are unable to see each other at present and are finding things difficult. Distance can put strain on a relationship for sure. So, you are not alone.

It is a good thing overall that you care about him so much

On the other hand, many people are finding it hard being together 24/7, so it’s tough all around.

It is a good thing overall that you care about him so much. Know that things will go back to normal and tensions will ease. Until then, do your best and hang in there.

Wishing you the very best,

Miriam

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