I am about to turn 60 and have taken early retirement from my job, but I am starting to regret my decision as I am at a loss as to how to fill my days.

We have a suckler farm but I’ve always left that side of things to himself, who has no intention of stepping back from things, which isn’t an issue. But I don’t want to get drawn into farm work at my stage in life. I was a nurse for nearly 40 years and I have done my time, but now I feel like I’ve nothing to get up for every morning and it’s starting to get me down.My adult children live overseas, and they’re great at keeping in touch. My daughter even wants me to go over to her in Abu Dhabi for a few weeks which will be lovely. But I’m more concerned about a long-term plan as to what I do now that I no longer have a job to go to.

I have a lovely group of friends who are all still working so I have felt out of the loop the past few months since I retired. I’m not looking for a new life, just a new challenge or purpose that will convince me I’ve done the right thing in finishing up what was a very gruelling career.

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– Monica, Co Kerry

Dear reader,

We all struggle with change, at any stage of life, and now that you’ve moved onto your next chapter it is only natural you are apprehensive as to what lies ahead.

You devoted your life to a very demanding profession, while raising a family, so it is completely understandable that you might struggle to suddenly find yourself with little to do, when your days, weeks and months were full to the brim. But now is the time to carefully consider what interests you could pursue, now you have the time.

Think back to before you married and settled down. Before you became a mammy; what did you do in your free time? Perhaps you played a sport, or belonged to a club? Maybe you dabbled in arts or crafts, all of which can be taken up again now you aren’t constrained by work shifts and alarm clocks.

Or, if you’re after something more stimulating you could look into further education. There is a raft of courses available across the country from part-time certificates to full-time Master's programmes, many of which offer distance learning if you don’t have a third level institution nearby. This could be done purely for the love of learning, and would certainly give you a focus. It could also enhance the many skills you have mastered down through the years in your career, and potentially give you new opportunities to pursue a totally different passion.

You devoted your life to a very demanding profession, while raising a family, so it is completely understandable that you might struggle to suddenly find yourself with little to do

You may also enjoy volunteering for an organisation such as Meals on Wheels or in a local nursing home. You obviously have a very caring nature and you can still embrace this, but perhaps without the pressure and strain of a demanding career.

I wouldn’t waste any time accepting that invitation from your daughter either, if you can afford it. With a big birthday approaching, you deserve to take some proper time out to celebrate. The chance to spend quality time with your child, where you’re not rushing back for work, is something to savour.

You have worked all your life, in a profession that demands the highest of standards and a level of care and compassion far higher than expected from the rest of society. Now is time to take a step back and take your time deciding the next adventure.

Do you have a problem you would like to share? If so, write in confidence to: Dear Miriam, Agony Aunt, Irish Country Living, Irish Farmers Journal, Irish Farm Centre, Bluebell, Dublin 12, or email miriam@farmersjournal.ie