As a farmer’s wife living in rural Ireland, I knew very little about the medical world and even less about cancer. I had never needed to know. When I was diagnosed as having the disease, I felt a sense of urgency. I had cancer. It must be treated without delay. I needed information and guidance.
The guidance came from wise and wonderful friends who had experience of cancer. They shared with me the lessons learned on their journeys through it. The advice they gave me has proven to be invaluable right through my treatment to date.
They advised me to take this journey one step at a time. They said there’s no rush, that I should take a few weeks to gather the information needed to make the right choices. They said to be confident and happy with my choice of medical professionals, to bring one or two people with me to all consultations and ask one of them to keep notes. Write down any questions that come to mind. Learn to ask for and accept help. Be kind to myself and spend time with people who do me good.
My husband, Brian, and my daughter, Grace, became my backup team in those early days. Grace and her red Filofax became a familiar and comforting sight at every consultation during the following months. She was my very own guardian angel.
I read a lot about cancer during that first week. I learned that every cancer diagnosis is different. There may be similarities in diagnoses and treatments but each individual case is utterly different. I was to hear that many times during my treatment: “Everybody is different.”
Six days after my initial cancer diagnosis, Brian, Grace and I met with a consultant heading up one of the cancer teams in the hospital in which I was diagnosed.
We were told that I had invasive ductal carcinoma. I had three tumours in my left breast and cancerous cells in a number of lymph nodes under my arm. We were told that my treatment would be overseen by a team of specialists and the final decision on treatment would be made after having CT and bone scans.
One week later we met the consultant for the second time, who recommended that my treatment start with chemotherapy, followed by surgery and then radiotherapy. I have to be honest and say that this consultant had not filled me with confidence during our first meeting.
By the time the second meeting was over, I knew I would not be back. My decision was made much easier by the fact that Brian and Grace felt the same. Where to turn next was the dilemma.
My good friends came to the rescue once again. They calmly helped me choose an oncologist to take charge of my treatment and at a later stage I could make the decision about surgery and even later about radiotherapy. With their help I chose David Fennelly, oncologist at St Vincent’s private hospital in Dublin.
This was a big decision as St Vincent’s is 120 miles from my home. But it was the right decision. From my first consultation last October, right through five months of chemotherapy, a 10-day hospital stay in March for surgery and now nine days into my radiotherapy treatment, I have felt happy and confident at all times. The standard of care has been excellent. Every member of staff has been professional, efficient and kind.
I learned a very important lesson during those early days: take the journey through cancer one step at a time.
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