Ten minutes was all I was supposed to be up there. We were only looking for the loan of a trailer. To make a short story long, Denis finally got a smartphone for his birthday. After years telling anyone who’d listen that the internet was rotting the brains of the youth, his own little phone packed up so the children bought him this thing that’s about the size of the wing mirror on a van.

And now he’s addicted. “Hang on a sec, I’ll look it up, Ann,” he says about 10 times a day. He’d be there looking at this Norwegian weather app and telling me the forecast and the “percentage likelihood of precipitation” and I’m saying to him: “Shur Denis, look out the window. And anyway, what do you need with the weather. You’re only planning to stay on the couch looking at the internet.”