We can all agree, whether it is a christening, wedding or funeral, as a nation we know how to celebrate life’s big moments. Some often contend that in rural areas, these events are marked even more fervently.

This was most definitely the case for Helena Scully. Born and raised in Ballyroan, Co Laois, Helena is from a big family, who run Scully’s Pub in the village and have a beef farm. She is of this parish too – in that she is an Irish Farmers Journal sales manager.

On Saturday 21 March, between family, friends, neighbours, customers and work colleagues, there were 320 people set to attend her and Kelvin Power’s wedding. Kelvin is from Clonmel, adding a Tipperary flavour to the mix.

However, this plan was scuppered by Government guidelines issued on mass gatherings due to the COVID-19 outbreak.

Difficult decisions

When it was announced just over a week before the wedding that no more than 100 people could gather indoors, Helena was at the Newpark Hotel in Kilkenny, where the afters were to take place. With the coronavirus spreading in Ireland prior to the official announcement, they were already considering the safety of their guests.

In truth, the couple, having weighed up the odds, knew their decision. “We were taking it very seriously all along, because you’re conscious that you’re bring people together,” explains Helena.

“Over 300 people is a massive crowd and we’re so lucky to have had so many people looking forward to the day; but you do think, oh my God, we’re going to disappoint these people.

“To be honest, from the feedback we got from people, a lot were relieved. The other question both Kelvin and I asked ourselves was, if we were invited to a wedding that week, would we have wanted to go? And the reality is no. Even having 100 people wasn’t on my radar, because I’m either full duck or no dinner, in that I either want everybody there or nobody there.”

And so, the difficult decision was taken to postpone the whole wedding – which had been a year and two months in the planning – kit and caboodle. Helena says she had agonised over the decision for days, but once it was made, she felt much better. With a local business background, all of the suppliers they were using for the wedding were from the midlands and Kilkenny, and all were supportive in accommodating the change. They went to speak with the parish priest, Fr Paddy Byrne, and that’s when things started to get interesting.

Both of us obviously still wanted to be married. So we rang Fr Paddy

“We went to him and originally said, ‘No, we’ll do the full day with everything together’. Then, after everything settled down, we felt we needed to mark 21 March someway. Both of us obviously still wanted to be married. So we rang Fr Paddy and said, ‘Sure look, we’ll get a blessing’. He actually said, ‘I can marry ye on the day and whenever the right time is, we’ll come back and have a big day’.”

A change in thinking

On 21 March, with just Fr Paddy and a sole witness, Helena and Kelvin were married in St Patrick’s Church, Ballyroan – with all the pews empty. Fr Paddy initially asked them if he could take a picture for his social media, which turned into a short video clip that garnered thousands of views and much attention online.

The day did not resemble the wedding the pair had envisaged, but in the end, that made it even more special. “We thought this was a great way to do it, because really, when you pull back everything, that’s what’s important – getting married to each other. It really changed my thinking.

“I was definitely your typical bride,” laughs Helena, “with the flowers, cake, wedding dress and everything else going on. Being a bride definitely consumes you. It takes up loads of your time and for that just to be placed to one side, was strange.

You know what, being under pressure to have that fabulous day – this definitely made me rethink the whole wedding thing

“It was a blow, I won’t lie, but you have to look at the grand scheme of things. Nobody belonging to Kelvin or myself is sick. Everybody is well at the moment, thank God. To be honest, it’s a nice finish to what should have been a sad story.

“You know what, being under pressure to have that fabulous day – this definitely made me rethink the whole wedding thing. We’re going to go again on 2 August hopefully. That’s a tentative date, but I’m not taking anything for granted after this. Hopefully, all our guests, all my community and Kelvin’s community, come safe and well out of this, that people really take action and look after themselves.”

Without a doubt, the coronavirus will bring stress and sadness to many of us, but if people take a leaf out of Helena and Kelvin’s book and prioritise what’s important, isn’t that something?

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