I have an issue that I wouldn’t mind getting your advice on. All my children are grown up and in their 20s.
Myself and my husband are vaccinated and now two of the three children are, thankfully. One got his jab through work and the other got a vaccine in a chemist. This gives me great comfort.
However, last week when I asked the middle girl, who’s in her mid-20s, was she registering with the 25-29 year olds for the vaccine, she told me she wasn’t going to take it.
This has caused a huge argument between the two of us, because I really think she needs to get it. She’s out and about with her friends a lot, and really, is very at risk of getting the virus.
She said that it’s her own choice and she doesn’t feel it’s necessary to be putting extra chemicals into her body, that she’s young and healthy.
I said it to her about the travel cert, the indoor dining and how she was putting others at risk, but it all fell on deaf ears
A woman I know locally actually works in a chemist and she kindly offered to put her name down. So I gave her my daughter’s details. But when she was called, she wouldn’t take it.
This escalated the argument altogether. I said it to her about the travel cert, the indoor dining and how she was putting others at risk, but it all fell on deaf ears.
I don’t know where to go from here, because the issue is off the table for discussion from her point of view
Now there’s more or less no communication on the issue. But genuinely Miriam, I’m worried for her. She’s my child and I don’t want her to get sick. Also, I would worry about her spreading the virus to other people.
I don’t know where to go from here, because the issue is off the table for discussion from her point of view. But I really feel like I need to get through to her how important it is that she takes the vaccine.
Where should I go from here, Miriam?
Dear Worried Mam,
Thank you very much for your email. This is definitely a tricky situation. Vaccines can be a divisive and sometimes even an explosive issue. But your concern is well-placed, you want your daughter to be safe and well.
Firstly, I think you need to change tact with regard to how you are approaching this situation. Your daughter is a young woman in her 20s and probably doesn’t want to feel like she is being told what to do. This approach of telling her what is best for her is causing her to shut you out.
I would say that she needs to consider all the facts
I would suggest trying to talk to her again, but this time in very calm and relaxed manner. Tell her that you respect her views on the vaccine and a the end of the day it is her choice what she does. But – and without getting mad – I would say that she needs to consider all the facts.
Explain to her the difficulties she will have if she wants to go abroad, the realities she will face with regard to indoor dining and also the element of protecting others.
I would finish the conversation then by telling her that you respect her decision
However, most importantly explain to her that her own health is at risk. Yes, while she is young and healthy, there is still a chance she could get sick.
I would finish the conversation then by telling her that you respect her decision, but you just want to make sure she knows that facts. I think this softer approach will resonate with her much more than confrontation.
Leave the issue with her then and let her make up her own mind.
Wishing you all the best,